Most couples go into marriage excited about the future and their sexual relationship.  Unfortunately, most of us were not prepared for what that actually entailed.  Unrealized familial, religious, and societal conditioning around sex shaped our ideas of what our marriage IS and what we think it SHOULD be.  But most of that conditioning was wrong and set us up to create a lot of heartache and unmet expectations.  If you are tired of fighting about sex, tired of feeling unloved, undesired, or resentful, or feel like sex is the only thing that matters to your spouse, let’s change that.

 

In couples coaching, we address the unhealthy patterns the two of you have created that are interfering with a good marriage and good sex. We address how you are each participating (or not participating) in that dynamic.  We look at how the sexual dynamic is a reflection of what is happening in the marriage, individually and as a couple.  We also work to overcome desire discrepancies, and create more emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical intimacy. 

 

In traditional couples therapy you spend a lot of time training each other to “meet your needs,” which works…until the person who asked you to do something wonders if you are doing it because you truly want to and love them OR you are just doing it because they asked you to.  Basically, a lot of couples therapy really doesn’t work.  Coaching moves you into a more integrity-based mindset that is both healing and transformative.

 

Coaching isn’t about propelling the lower-desire partner into having more sex to accommodate their spouse.  Coaching is about helping you find the freedom and security in being true to yourself, while working to create a collaborative marriage that honors the best in the both of you and create a sexual relationship that is worth wanting.