I help Christian women embrace their sexuality and love their sex life!
Hi, I'm Amanda!
For many years, I hated sex.
I grew up in a home where we didn’t talk about it. As a teen I felt a lot of shame about my sexual thoughts and feelings. And when I got married, sex was NOT what I thought it would be.
For years I had sex out of obligation. I did it just to fulfill his “needs” and get him off my back for a while. It wasn’t pleasurable and I felt used, broken, and ashamed. And honestly, I would have been fine if we never had sex again.
After twelve years of marriage, I decided something needed to change. I began educating myself, facing my sexual shame head on, and things started to shift. I started to see myself and sex in a new way. Sex became something that could bless my life and my marriage instead of hinder it.
I have been studying sex and sexuality for the last 12 years.
I now LOVE sex!
And I can help you change the way you feel about it too!
What My Clients Are Saying
Go for it!
My Relationship Has Done a 180
I reached out to Amanda because my relationship was in trouble. I love my partner and our family but my interest in being intimate had dwindled to the point that it was starting to cause serious problems. I wanted to feel more desire for my partner, but I didn’t know how to. I chalked it up to us being together for a long time and my changing hormones. I was initially a little skeptical about Amanda’s approach but decided to keep an open mind and give it a try. I can’t tell you how glad I am that I did. Now, instead of feeling like intimacy with my partner is an obligation or something I “have to” do, it is something I look forward to and cherish. Our relationship has transformed and feels so much bigger and closer now. I wholeheartedly recommend working with Amanda. Let her help you the way she helped me!
After 20 years of marriage I’m enjoying sex
My husband signed me up to talk with Amanda. I didn’t want to meet with her. For the last 10 years of our 20-year marriage my husband has been trying to help me find pleasure in sex. His efforts, though well intended and kind, just made me feel broken. I put up walls and effectively shut down my sexuality. I had blocked off most negative emotions and was numbing rather than facing my challenges. My first conversation with Amanda helped me see the need for change. I was a little nervous about the group coaching and I knew it would be hard, but I recognized I needed help to address my issues.
Concerns about sharing my bedroom troubles with a group disappeared after one meeting. It was nice to hear other women share their stories; to realize I wasn’t alone. I also learned a lot from their successes and really felt joy with them. Sex was a taboo topic growing up and talking about it openly and learning from each other helped normalize it for me. In fact, now I find myself bringing it up with friends to learn from their experiences and share my new knowledge. I was sad when our session ended because I really wish those women the best on the rest of their journey.
As far as Amanda goes, she was so easy to talk to. She helped me recognize for myself where my thoughts were limiting me. She asked me questions and enabled me to listen and accept the answers that I had been ignoring. Her teachings about my higher and lower desires and letting myself feel my emotions without judgement were especially important for me to stay focused on how I wanted to change and not beating myself up when I failed to see immediate results. Meeting weekly helped me stay accountable and mindful as I tried to adjust my daily thoughts about myself and sex. By the end of our session I had an entirely different attitude towards sex. I learned to own my own sexuality and now I am able to share it with my husband. I am cultivating desire and giving myself permission to feel emotions without judgement. I’m still learning but I am no longer “enduring” sex; I’m enjoying it. I am also taking more responsibility for my thoughts and feelings and that has improved aspects of my parenting, productivity, and ability to be present in the moment. Amanda’s coaching has helped me turn a corner I have been facing and avoiding for 10 years. I had read so many books and taken other courses, but Amanda’s work drove me to take ownership and make real change. Thank you Amanda.
Amanda was an answer to a prayer!
Coaching with Amanda Louder has changed my life! My marriage was in a very bad place and I had no idea how to make the changes needed. I met Amanda after just having my 5th baby and I hated sex at the time. Over the years there were times I liked sex okay but it wasn’t anything to be excited about (no orgasm). I knew this was affecting our marriage and I didn’t know if I could keep going without there being some change. I tried to find a Sex Therapist and couldn’t find one nearby or with our values.
Amanda was an answer to a prayer, literally.
Amanda’s coaching helped me to change the way I thought about myself, my husband, my marriage, and sex. It was time consuming and sometimes overwhelming but I am so thankful that I found her. She has an amazing way of helping you discover yourself and she gives you tools to change the way you think and feel. Sometimes we are in our own way of happiness.
I have to say my marriage has taken a drastic turn for the best. Sex is soooo much fun now! I get my orgasm and he gets his . I daydream about it where before I would have never have imaged doing that. I say “yes” to sex more often than not. We flirt! We are trying fun new things and communicating more. We feel a stronger connection to each other and a greater love for each other. It’s still a work in progress but now I know what tools to use to progress in our marriage to make it happy and whole.
Please if your marriage is struggling please work with Amanda! I know she can help you! Take a leap of faith.
Worth every penny!
I felt like coaching was exactly what I needed. I was ready to make a change and Amanda gave me the tools to make my life what I want it to be. If you’re ready to hear the hard truth that you are the catalyst to make your life amazing then this is for you.
Inviting and Easy to Learn From
Amanda is such a down to earth person that I felt I could share my real thoughts and feelings with her immediately. She helped me to see what my limiting beliefs were and led me to find thoughts that would work for me. Amanda even goes the extra mile with email follow ups and little reminders for me to read throughout my day so that I can get back to productive and empowering thoughts.
Such an enlightening experience!
I’m so grateful to have had the opportunity to work with Amanda. I had no idea that my sessions with her would literally change my life. I know this must sound too good to be true but if I hadn’t experienced it I wouldn’t believe it either. I was hoping for some relief from the negative feelings that have plagued me throughout all of my life, but what Amanda taught me gave me far more than I expected. I learned so much about myself and about my relationship with my husband and relationships over-all. I learned how to recognize and redirect my negative thoughts about myself and others. The tools that Amanda taught me have enabled me to overcome my worries, anxieties and feelings of unworthiness. My mind is clear of the negative chatter and if it starts to creep in I know how to catch it and stop it. My husband and I are closer than ever. We have been married for forty years and since working with Amanda I feel as though we are on our honeymoon again! I have finally learned how to be honest with myself and with my husband. I have a new found confidence in myself and have learned how to more easily communicate my feelings. I highly recommend Amanda as a Life Coach. She is extremely knowledgeable and thoughtful. I felt safe talking to her and was able to open up to her about subjects that I have never talked to anyone about. She has been such a blessing in my life and in my marriage!
Caring and Genuine
Amanda has coached me through one of the most difficult times of my life. I can say without a doubt that her love and perspective helped me get through. I really appreciate her practical yet no nonsense approach. You won’t regret working with her!
So Worth It!!!
I’ve always struggled with depression, my self worth and being enough. I was inspired to take Amanda’s group coaching program to learn and put into practice how to change my thinking and love myself again. I know I will have days when I’ll take steps backwards. But I now have the tools for consistent change.
It’s been fun to meet new sisters in the program who are in similar circumstances!
I trust Amanda because she has been in low places and come through it. She can relate! She has helped me have a clearer vision of my place with my Heavenly Parents. She has had faith in me when I had none for myself.
I still have a long way to go, but now when I look in the mirror I see a woman of worth and see little glimpses of Heavenly Mother in myself. Thank you, Amanda for sharing your experiences and teachings and for believing in me!
Sex is for me too!
I always come away from Amanda’s class feeling uplifted and inspired. Her class is practical and open. The shared experiences of the other women in the class brought us closer together and formed immediate friendships. Differences in race, religion, and lifestyles were a non-issue. We are all women wanting to love our significant other’s deeply and sexually, and the bond was immediate within the sisterhood!
I found out that sex is for me too. It is for me to enjoy and to decompress with. It’s not just a man thing! I am still working on this concept, but I am inspired by it.
Amanda’s class was an overall fit. All areas of life were brought into focus. It was about whatever I wanted to work on, which was not usually sex. Sex came because I was working on loving myself more and loving my spouse too. Thank you Amanda for a great experience. It was well worth the time and money!
I am a believer!
Before I tried coaching with Amanda, I felt like I was so far beyond help. I had tried everything I could think of (Drs, medicine, professional sex therapy, books, movies, supplements… you name it, I tried it) to try and improve my interest in sex. Nothing worked. I had given up hope that it would ever get better, and I resigned myself to sex just being something I tolerated to keep my marriage together. I heard one of Amanda’s podcasts, and just for giggles I signed up for a free mini session. I KNEW that there was nothing she could tell me that I hadn’t already heard, seen, or read. How wrong I was! After talking with her for a few minutes, and talking with my husband for quite a few minutes, we decided to sign up for coaching. 12 weeks later (actually it was 10!) and I am a believer! Sex is no longer cause for anxiety, fear, annoyance…. it’s something I actually look forward to! I can’t thank or recommend coaching with Amanda enough!
Coaching to help become my best self
Embrace you was a wonderful course. It allowed me to understand underlying thoughts that had been instilled in me from a very young age. Thoughts that were stifling me to show up as my best self in my relationship and in life.
Amanda lovingly and directly helps guide in her coaching to allow understanding, learning, and betterment.
Wowza! You probably need this!
I started this coaching program when I realized my 10 yr anniversary was just around the corner and I was feeling broken and hopless when it came to having an intimate relationship with my husband. Between, physical pain, infertility, addiction, and personal insecurities, I dreaded sex with my husband. With this program, and a lot of work, we have been able to redefine what it can look like for our relationship and actually have mutual enjoyment!
This program didn’t solve all my problems but it gave me the tools to solve them, as they come up, on my own. It brought hope back into my line of vision and it allowed me to see the areas of my life that needed more self compassion.
If you’re in a sex starved marriage, this is worth every penny!
She normalized my experience
Amanda is an amazing coach and her message is so needed in the world today! She really normalized my experience with the “good girl syndrome” having grown up in the church and received many well meaning but damaging messages. I am hopeful and excited for the rising generation to be raised by mothers who embrace their sexuality and honor themselves in their relationships. Amanda’s membership is a safe and fun way to learn from others who struggle with similar things and to see that you’re not alone and you’re actually normal. We are different than our husbands but sometimes when they are the only one we’re talking to about our intimacy, we don’t know that those differences are ok and even important. I highly recommend Amanda’s program even if you feel satisfied with your sex life, she can always help you take it to the next level!
Everything I didn’t know I needed
To say group coaching was life changing for me is an understatement. I am a completely different person than I was 12 weeks ago. It was a huge sacrifice for me to commit to the time and finances for it, and 1000% worth it. I went into coaching hoping to improve my sex life. Not that it was bad before, but I knew I was missing some pieces. What I didn’t expect is for it to change my outlook on every aspect of my life. I am not only a more passionate and loving wife, but a more patient mother and empathetic friend. However, the biggest relationship improvement I’ve seen through group coaching has been with myself. I’ve learned to love myself unconditionally and let go of negative thoughts I’ve had for years. Improving my relationship with myself makes all the other relationships in my life even better. I was really skeptical about group coaching and at first my husband was too, but we had a strong feeling that I needed to do it. I am truly so grateful for what Amanda has taught me and the tools she’s given me to continue to improve. I promise that whether you feel like your marriage and sex life is amazing or you already recognize that you could use help, group coaching can change everything for the better.
Highly Recommend Amanda!
Amanda is an AMAZING life coach! She was able to listen to my story & help bring awareness to EXACTLY how I was feeling (something that was hard for me to pinpoint at the time.) She helped me figure out & summarize exactly what I was thinking, what action I was taking, & what results it was giving me in my life. She gave me great takeaways, insight into solution options, & help me clarify what I REALLY wanted during a big transition in my life. I highly recommend her to anyone, for any problem!
Working with Amanda worth the time and money!
I knew that I needed some help, but I didn’t realize just how much I could really change my entire life. Amanda helped me see life from a whole different perspective and see just how much I can change my brain and through changing my brain, Create a life I love and create a version of myself that I love. I’ve always felt like no matter what, my thoughts were me, my thoughts were true. But Amanda taught me that my thoughts are optional and I can choose whatever thoughts I want and choose the thoughts that actually serve me! That’s huge! I came to her with just a couple struggles and turns out she helped me with much much more than I expected. When I work with Amanda I feel like she truly cares about me and my personal life. If you’re thinking about working with her, stop thinking and just do it! It will help your life in every way! And not only did she help me but she left me with many tools that I can now use for the rest of my life. Coaching with her is the gift the keeps on giving!!
Worth the investment!
Coaching with Amanda has changed my life for the better! I am aware of what I’m thinking and feeling so I’m not just reacting to life but choosing what I want to think to create the results I want in my life. I’m reframing the thoughts that aren’t serving me and getting rid of the negative self talk because no growth comes from hate. Something important I learned was I was being co dependent in my relationship and I changed that. I also learned what my definition of love for my family was; what they were doing for me. Like they owed my something. I changed that mindset that same day and has made such a difference in my mood in parenting my young kids.
I feel like I have tools to manage my mind that I would have never found by myself. I will use these tools the rest of my life and am so grateful I chose to do this coaching program with Amanda!
Be ready to apply yourself and set time aside every day/week to work on yourself because you are worth it!
An Unexpected Life Change
I started meeting with Amanda desperately needing help with my lack of desire for sex. Little did I know that the tools she would teach me would help in almost every aspect of my life. Not only has my desire for sex improved, but I have also become a better wife, mom, and just a better person in general. As someone who has struggled with anxiety almost my whole life, the tools Amanda taught me for dealing with my everyday anxiety has changed my life. I feel empowered, confident, and just really, really happy. I would meet with Amanda every week for the rest of forever if I could. I truly believe that Amanda and her coaching program could help you no matter what your struggles might be. I am forever grateful that I clicked on her ad.
You deserve this!
I am married to an amazing man who wants nothing more than to please me, and I have always felt that I had nothing to complain about, so I tried not to. Yet I have wondered for years why I didn’t want sex more than I did. I had resigned myself to the idea that I just had a low desire for sex, and I assumed it was just who I was. And then I met Amanda.
I was raised in a strict home where we never spoke about sex and just being able to speak to someone so freely still blows me away. I have shared things with her I have never told to anyone – it’s amazing. And now I am finally, after 25 amazing years of marriage, on my way to spending the rest of my married life feeling like the sexual woman I was born to be!
If you are at all on the fence – trust me, you deserve this.
The Puzzle Pieces Can Fit Together
My husband and I had a pattern and, after twenty-three years, it was difficult for either of us to feel loved, respected, heard, or connected. We had spent most of our marriage working on our relationship. Though I dreaded communicating with him, because it always triggered the pattern, I would do it in hopes of making our marriage stronger and better. We would attend seminars, conferences, and retreats trying to learn what we could do to improve our relationship. We listened, and still do, to thirty-ish different podcasts about sex and marriage. Still, the pattern continued. It was like being shown the photo of a beautiful completed puzzle, but feeling like the pieces we held fit a different puzzle altogether. Learning of and reading about David Schnarch’s work made me feel that differentiation must be the missing piece, but I could not figure out how to become solid in myself since our pattern seemed to prevent that. When I signed up for the free consult with Amanda, I was truly desperate. I needed our pattern to change, but quite honestly, I was not convinced anything could ever accomplish that. I am grateful and blessed to admit I was wrong. Amanda gave me the tools I needed to become solid in myself. The changes I made ended the pattern we were in. The more solid I became in who I wanted to be, the better our relationship got. My fear of communicating with my husband is gone, and I found myself desiring him and wanting to be in his presence more and more. There is a peace in our relationship that we have not had in years. In finding myself, I also found the man I fell in love with years ago. Amanda helped me sort my puzzle pieces and showed me how to get the edge pieces in. From there, the pieces started fitting together. She is the angel that saved our marriage and, in a few short weeks, armed me with the tools I needed to make our marriage more than I dreamed possible. I am forever indebted to her for the lessons I have learned from her.
Coaching with Amanda was life changing
After some encouragement from my husband, I signed up to do a 12 week group coaching session with Amanda. I was somewhat interested. I had listened to a couple of her podcasts, but was skeptical that coaching would do much for me. I was the lower desire partner and this had been a cause of frustration for us in our marriage. I just wasn’t in the mood nearly as much as my husband. I didn’t know how to create desire for sex and I often wanted things to be “perfect” in order for it to happen. I love that Amanda was trained by Brooke Castillo. The methods she uses in coaching not only helped me understand how my thoughts were creating my emotions, but helped me to create new, empowering thoughts which could help me in my relationship with my husband and beyond. She also taught me a lot about how sex starts in the brain and helped me to create that emotional intimacy I was craving. I kept thinking I needed to change my husband’s behavior so I could feel connected to him, but really I needed to start by changing my thoughts! This experience surprised me in that it was life changing for me. I thought I was doing well enough already on my own, but through coaching, her videos, and assignments I learned so much. Definitely worth it!
My life has been changed
I was SO hesitant spending the money to have a life coach. I remember telling my husband, “but we can go on such a fun vacation for the amount of money I’m about to spend.” And he responded, “Yes, but how great will it be for you to actually be present on that vacation.” Talk about a punch in the gut. I knew I needed a change.
Coaching was WORTH EVERY PENNY. I was a little hesitant as I thought I was fine and could figure things out on my own. I was wrong! Amanda helped me every step of the way. The best part-no judgement.
Before coaching my thoughts would spin out of control. I almost felt as if there had to be something wrong with me. Guess what- I’m normal! Amanda taught me just how to get control of these thoughts and then to get back on track when I would derail.
Amanda has ALL of the tools needed to be in control of your life. I looked forward to my weekly sessions with her and celebrating small victories. She was also very available throughout the week if I ever had any questions or couldn’t get control of the thought that was bugging me.
Through working with Amanda I was able to uncover a traumatic part of my past, heal from it, and now understand WHY my brain operates the way it does under certain circumstances, and then move on from it.
I never knew just how much my sex life was affected by my thoughts running a million miles a minute-It was just little things that I needed to change (and continue to work on) that make my relationship with my husband SO much better.
Amanda always had very relatable stories and asked very thought provoking questions to make me dig a little deeper.
I specifically LOVED the worksheets/homework that she would give. Working on myself was so needed, and now a thought download is a part of my day that I look forward to the most.
I couldn’t be more grateful that I said yes and took a chance on me, and figuring out how my brain works and ways that I could improve!
Thoughts create feelings
Group coaching with Amanda helped me daily because I was made aware of my thoughts, and that my thoughts create my feelings. Knowing this helped me to think more positively about big and little situations.
Coaching was a great experience for me. I learned a lot about myself, and how to have a better perspective about life and people in general.
I learned that my value doesn’t change, but even more importantly I learned that other people’s value doesn’t change either, we all have inherent value. Learning and remembering this helps me to be aware of my thoughts and feelings, and therefore not to judge too harshly.
My husband and I are closer, this is because I have learned to take more time to connect with him and share my desires.
Coaching was eye opening and really so good, I loved the time I was able to spend learning. Thank you!
Working with Amanda has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made! I NEVER thought I’d be able to have an enjoyable sex life because sex was very physically painful for me. While I still considered my marriage excellent, there were aspects that definitely needed improvement. When I first met with Amanda my goal was just painless sex. Not only was I able to achieve that, she helped me control my thoughts enough, and taught me the skills to be able to actually ENJOY sex too! Our sex life went from once every couple months (usually ending in tears) to multiple times a week, pain free! I have learned SO much from her during sessions and through her podcasts. I’ve always considered my marriage to be really good, but with her help, it has drastically improved, our communication is excellent, the sex is great, I am able to control my thoughts enough that I was able to stop taking anxiety medication! I am SO grateful for all her advice and teachings. I would recommend her to anyone and everyone!
Sex Coaching and SO much more!
I found a great deal of value in the Embrace You group coaching program. I was surprised to feel ‘normal’ since many of the others in my group were struggling with similar things that I was. Being coached by Amanda was SO good and helpful. She could point out my thoughts that were either keeping me stuck or not serving me. I learned that God cares about my sexual relationship between me & my husband. I can ask for help. And I also learned that I get to decide what is right for me, no one else. I learned how to own my thoughts, feelings and actions. This program helped me open up to my husband more and have actual conversation and not just beat around the bush about sex. If I want something I ask. If he wants something he asks. I feel that I gained more confidence in and out of the bedroom. I am learning to accept me – where I am – without feeling like I have to apologize. The confidence I gained has spilled over into other areas of my life and I have more compassion for myself and others.
Amanda’s coaching was just what I needed
Amanda coached me on a situation that has been coming up for years with one relationship in my life. She helped me write a new model for interacting in this relationship. Amanda’s coaching helped me to view my thoughts in a way that will give me the results I want in the relationship, regardless of the behavior of the other person. She is easy to talk to and I felt she really cared and wanted to help me. She is also not afraid to be direct in her advice, which I appreciated. I would recommend Amanda to anyone who needs to work on finding new thoughts in any type of relationship.
Working With Amanda Is Self-Care
I am so glad I worked with Amanda. She helped me take ownership of my thoughts and feelings and become more confident in my sexuality. Everything she teaches can be applied to so many aspects of life. She helped me love myself more and become a better wife and mother. I loved going to class every week because it was a chance for me to take a break from the craziness of motherhood and wifehood and do something for myself. I loved Amanda’s caring, yet “no-nonsense” approach to coaching. She tells it like it is, but you know that she does it out of love. This is something I recommend that all women do to improve themselves and their relationships. Thanks Amanda!
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